Sunday, March 04, 2007

Chicks and Bros v. Dicks and Hoes

There's a rule amongst female friends we learn from a young age on the playground: chicks before dicks. That is the 'policy' where it is stipulated that it's not OK to put a guy between a friendship. It would be unwise to forego spending time with your girl friends in favour of spending time with a boyfriend (especially when you're already practically attached at the hip). A friendship can easily be compromised when a boy is put before a girl friend. The same can go for the opposite sex: bros before hoes.

However, this rule changes when the friends are of the opposite sex. What happens then? Is it OK for the guy to put the girlfriend before the girl friend? After all, she is a friend, just the same as a male friend, right?

It's funny how we preach on how it's important to put a friend, that is perhaps more permanent, before a girl/boyfriend/lover/crush/fling/bed buddy. But the rules alter when the friends are of the opposite sex and one of them acquires a 'significant other'. Suddenly the friendship has to be put on the back burner in favour of the SO[B]. I believe this is how a lot of male-female friendships breakdown, which is sad, because I really hope my friendships are stronger than that.

This is just an observation, people, I'm not speaking from personal experience (yet). I just realized it lately and because I do have a majority of male friends, it's something that I will need to prepare myself for and to expect because let's face it: girls can be crazy and drama-lovers. People are gonna settle down, get laid, get married and whatnot and I do recognize the need to get ass, believe you me, so time/commitment away from friends need to be made. I can accept that. I've also realized that if/whenever I become a girlfriend, I will promise to learn to accept this "friends before lovers thing" because after all, I'm a friend too.

So, I guess you can also say this is a little PSA to all those girls and guys who have SOs with friends of the opposite sex and have issues with it. I've seen this kinda problem in other relationships where a problem (jealousy) develops over their SOs being friends with the opposite sex and spending 'too much time' with them. All I have to say to y'all: not everyone wants your girl/boyfriend, so get over yourself.

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