Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Business Casual Sex

I admire the gay community. Somewhat.

Of course, I don't admire the discrimination and all those recourses they suffer for being a homosexual. However, I do admire the freedom they have within their community to express themselves. And as offensive it may seem to the outside world, they seem so free and comfortable with it.

I've been reading an anonymous journal page of someone who classifies their self as a "Bareback Top". How much do I love that these gays have specific labels of each other that specifically outlines their preferential sex position?

You can call me Top, then Bottom with a Twist at the End.

I love how casual homosexuals are with their sexualities ... albeit within their community. It's so honest and frank. I haven't known too many gay people in my life, but the ones that I have known, I have observed. I have observed them with their gay peers and I have observed them partying. I envy how they are able to express their selves, although it has to be in the confines of gay clubs, parties and functions.

So why is the 'straight community' not as flamboyant and honest? I think a lot of this has to do with gender, primarily. There's a certain type of 'modesty' that men and women are taught to adhere to with one another: opening doors for each other, pulling out chairs, giving each other flowers/gifts/anything else to show we feel about each other without saying it, and all that other chivalry bullshit. I'm sure the gay community has all of that too, but those are probably the more modest gays. Sex in the straight community is considered a 'racy' topic and in most cases, restricted to those 18 and over. Fuck, modesty comes with a price because we even have to pay to watch our favourite shows about sex (i.e. Sex and the City, The L Word).

In the gay community, it seems that their version of 'casual sex' is just that. It is as casual as an online posting on Craigslist, click, click, click and an hour or so later, BAM! Friday night is complete. No phone number exchange is necessary, not even a name. Just wham. Bam. Thank you, ma'am, er, sir.

In the straight community, casual sex is has its formalities, much like a business transaction. The proposal ("How you doin'?"), the agreement ("Okay, fine."), the terms of the agreement ("It's just sex, no strings attached, okay? Okay."), and the post-sex 'drama' (the importance of the hush-hush and discreetness of it all).

I can't completely envy the sexual freedom in the gay community. STDs and such are rampant and not an uncommon occurrence in the community, which is quite possibly the result of all the sexual casualness. But in the end, it all comes down to the individual, both gay and straight. Be smart, get tested, use a condom, blah blah blah.

In a perfect world, 'business casual' sex would be ideal. All parties are in agreement as to what transpires and the risks to their investments. All disclosure of feelings and mutual times of meetings are made. The terms don't need to be written down, it is understood or a handshake will do. Should the partnership have to dissolve, it is a clean sweep and everyone leaves with what they've come in with, or do not lose more than what they've invested. And re-investments are always welcome at a later date. If only everything could be tied up in a neat little package, huh?

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Adventures in Real Estate

I came home late from a night of Poker and Alex had the audacity to wake me up at the ungodly hour of 9 a.m. this morning. Him and Alexey were going to Hamilton to check out some properties that we were interested in purchasing. Twenty minutes later (yes, twenty minutes to wake up, get my face on and get dressed), Alex was at my door. My dad gave us a long lecture for about an hour about real estate while Alex ate 'breakfast', and then we were off.

It's a good thing Hamilton is far, because I had a good nap on the ride over with my 6 hours or less of sleep from the night before. The thing with Hamilton though, is that I hate that city. The notorious one-way streets and the fact that it is a factory-town, so it's so dowdy. Our real estate finds ranged from good to laughable. We saw some great residential investments at bargain prices (i.e. 'fixer-uppers') and some really awful ones (it's amazing how much shit people can do to a place).

It's a shame none of us thought to bring a camera at first because I wish I could show everyone the properties we saw. We only thought to buy a disposable one two-thirds into our search. I also wish I didn't wear my expensive new Ugg boots because I did not foresee Alexey's erratic driving behaviour on one-way streets and his Saab's useless cupholder. Not once, but twice, he made a crazy turn and my coffee, then my tea, flipped over and got on my boots. UGHHH. It's a good thing the coffee is the same shade as my boots otherwise Alexey would have a Tim Horton's coffee shoved up his colon.

The first property we saw was a quaint little house on a dead-end street near the factories. I want to say it was 'shabby chic' but it was more shabby than chic. In fact, it was nowhere near 'chic'. We put it on the 'maybe' list and moved on.

We even saw a couple commercial properties. The area we were can only be classified as 'ghetto'. Most of the businesses on the street were closed down and the ones that were open looked real desolate. It would not be ideal to run a business here, let alone attempt to try and rent out space to run a business. I was amazed at the condition of most of these places. Most of them were used as storages or abandoned and boarded up. One of them had a not-so-discreet collapsed roof and they had covered the walls with roof shingles (huh?!). Amazing. I think we'll save investing on commercial properties until we become a bit more comfortable with purchasing property. I think there's a lot to learn about commercial properties.

We did learn one important thing in real estate today, though. Did you know the 'North' and 'South' on street signs are important? For example, Wellington Street North is not the same as Wellington Street South. Discovering 124 Wellington Street North was not 124 Wellington Street South was a riot. I laughed my ass off for 3 blocks. Doy.

We saw lots of good potentials. My favourite one was a pretty decent 4-storey(?) house ideal for renting out OR HAVING AMAZING WILD HOUSE PARTIES! We'll see, but it was definitely put on our 'more-than-maybe' list.

We didn't go into any of the properties we saw, so we did lots of trespassing and peering into windows, which was kinda fun. I was amazed to discover people living in places which should not have been deemed liveable. A lot of people were probably wondering why two white guys and an Asian chick were scamping around backyards and taking pictures.

By the end of the day we had seen about 8 properties all over Hamilton and inhaled so much Tim Horton's coffees. I must say, it was quite interesting looking at property. We narrowed down our decisions to a few places. I'm not really sure what we're gonna do yet, but we have about a week to put in our bids. We're still doing our research, trying to learn more about buying real estate and my parents think I need to take my time with this. Thing is, at this point, time is not on our sides, so who knows? We might just take a stab at it with our eyes closed. I mean, I believe we can make a good partnership because we are all willing to be committed to putting our time and labour into doing whatever we need to do to make it work. However, I just wonder how committed we can realistically be. Half of us are in school and my hours at the office prevent me from doing much else but wish I could do this. Plus, there is the distance factor.

On the other hand, this could be an exciting new [ad]venture.

Monday, November 19, 2007

2 Dates 1 Day

So I finally saw it. 'It' being '2 Girls 1 Cup' and you know what? I totally psyched myself out with this thing. I didn't even flinch. I saw it with another guy and he kept looking away. I didn't even blink (well, yes I did, the video isn't that short). I win, I'm the champ! I survived '2 Girls 1 Cup'! Woo woo. To top it off, I located that video where the horse fucks the guy. I laughed. You just can't explain why people do the things they do (and those are the fascinating ones).

On Saturday, I went on my horse-back riding date with 'M'. We actually had to wait a bit so we went out for some food first. He took me to this cajun place which was really, really good. He definitely got bonus points for originality for a first date: horse-back riding and spicy food. Although I haven't been horse-back riding in about a decade, it was like riding a bicycle -- with four legs, lungs and shits -- alot. Come to think of it, the concept of the date was pretty sexual, wouldn't you say? Spicy food, the feel of an animal pounding between your legs...

Later that night, I got a call from V, the guy I went out with like a month ago. He's been really busy (or so he claims) because he's in the renovation business and he's trying to get a lot of stuff done before the snow hits. Understandable. At first I questioned the ethicalness of going on two dates in one day with two different guys. That question lingered in my head for like half a second. This is what is so great about being single -- not having to question this kinda stuff because you are free to do whatever you feel like. Even if it steps on a few toes, what does it matter? Is there some kind of dating etiquette that says I can't? I'm not a monogamous person, not even for a day. I've come to terms with that. And I felt like going out again anyway (especially since my original plans of going out with friends fell through).

We saw Beowolf (good graphics, OK plot, slept through a chunk of it) and later went back to his place where I taught him how to play Poker...regular Poker. And then we watched '2 Girls 1 Cup' (yeah I know, I'm making this thing infectious) and the horse-man fuck. What a great way to end a date, eh? Kinda weird to have watched the horse video after going horse-back riding. LOL WEEEEIIIIRD. We talked real estate and just about anything all night. It was nice but I hope there's other things we can talk about (or not talk at all ;)) next time because I'm sick of talking about work sometimes.

Speaking of which, I need to go to bed.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

2 Girls 1 Cup

edited to add below: My favourite 'Reaction video' so far...

So one day, I was bored and flipping through a website and notice that there quite a few listings of '2 Girls 1 Cup Reactions'. There were a number of people taping themselves watching some video called '2 Girls 1 Cup' on their computers. Their reactions were priceless.

But what is this thing called '2 Girls 1 Cup'? My question was answered by comments on the videos along the lines of "2 Girls 1 Cup is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen in my life". The reaction videos made this video so much more intriguing but I admit I was a little freaked out because the reactions from everyone ranged from horrified to nauseated to 'run out of the room'. So I did a bit of researching beforehand and someone actually described what the video is about. It sounds pretty gross, however, I believe that I have SEEN POSITIVELY EVERYTHING and nothing can possibly phase me.

So I started watching the first four seconds of the video and then I had to stop. Can I do this? Even the guys on those reaction videos seemed absolutely grossed out and you would think they'd be able to take something that extreme. Even Joe Rogan, whose job is to not be grossed out, can't even seem to take it (it is rumoured he is now trying to 'top 2 Girls 1 Cup'). Some of them looked seriously on the verge of puking.

I told others about it, and I got them intrigued. We agreed to get together and watch it while taping ourselves too. However, because of a combination of mixed schedules and impatience, I think about half of them have seen it. I've received mixed responses from laughter to "you really have to not picture yourself in the video and just put yourself in the 24th person to not get grossed out". Great. Now I'm back to being on my own in seeing this.


Gay men are funny. Black men are funny. Black gay men are...

Harder Faster Stronger

I'm deliriously happy that the week is over although it would be hard to tell from the look on my face: tired eyes, yawning and not doing much but sitting in front of my laptop on this Saturday morning. Why am I awake this early? Because of indigestion from last night's late-night fast food binge brought to me by Burger King. Nothing ends a Friday night than sitting in the BK parking lot noshing on greasy food. Mmm.

I can now breathe easier for the rest of the year. A big litigation case I had been working on is over and I can give a big sigh of relief. Also I managed to do all ten or so of my closings this week, which is a big accomplishment even if you don't get what I mean.

Also, I had to let go of yet another assistant. *sigh* I don't mean to sound arrogant, but why can't I just find someone as good as me? I'm sick of hiring, training, re-training (because they forget what they learned the first week) and then firing. Apparently my situation is not uncommon as I have spoken with some other friends in positions where they require an assistant and are in similar situations (but in different workplaces). Is it just me, or have most people just lost or don't ever acquire common sense? Seriously, I don't ask for too much, but even simple office tasks are just too much to remember, let alone handle. Yep, I'm irritable as of late.

In other more joyous news, I recently found out not one, but two friends of mine each had babies this week (not together, one is a highschool friend and one is a college friend and they're both male). I'm in awe of all this because this is just too fast! I can hardly fathom knowing anyone my age getting married, let alone have offspring! [Insert obligatory "OMG WE'RE OLD" comment]

Okay so the Hell Week is over. I can finally get back to regular programming. I've got lots to do, especially after this 'delay' where I had no energy or time to do any personal things for the past two weeks because of work. Time to put things in fourth gear and get going. Hey, the year is almost over!

Things to do before noon:

- call bank and ask them why I'm not rich[er]

- plan Vermont trip/convince others why driving to Banff for 1.5 days straight is ridiculous

- book hotel suite for superfantastic hotel birthday party in Niagara (in the words of Biggie, "If ya don't know, now ya know.")

- take a nap?

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Hardcore and More

Man, I'm really not looking forward to tomorrow... or the rest of this week for that matter. It's gonna be a pretty hardcore work week for me, too bad it had to follow a hardcore weekend because I'm still feeling the effects. Today I worked 11.5 hours! I started my day early at 8:30 am to get to the courthouse as soon as it opened and I was in the office until 8 pm because of a litigation file that had an urgent deadline. It sucked because I had so many other last minute deadlines to fulfill. Hmm, I wonder if I can get into the office early tomorrow.

I wish I could update this thing more often. It's too bad work makes me have no time and non-exciting.

Last night I had a good dance class, especially since for once, I was really into the song we were doing (oddly enough it was the 'theme song' from the weekend, Rihanna's 'Don't Stop the Music'). I was in no physical condition to actually exert myself because I was soooo exhausted. But I really pushed. I even remembered the entire routine today and I usually forget routines as soon as the class is over.

'M' called me today regarding our date. He had suggested some exciting things like horse-back riding and spicy food. Oooooh. I'm quite intrigued and looking forward to it. At least it's something to look forward to when this week is over.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Someone else is getting older and it's not me! YAY!

Man, I haven't partied hard in awhile... until last night. Right now I'm feeling really exhausted. I'm kinda glad my plans to do a The Office marathon with Alex didn't go through. I got about 5 hours of sleep at Vicki's and then I had brunch with Quang and the Lam family this morning. Mind you, I was heavily hungover. Greasy rich Chinese food really did the trick.

Vicki's birthday celebration actually started the night before. Me, Vicki and Jonny went out to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse ($) for dinner. It was fantastic and delicious and no doubt, expensive. I know alot of people would argue that it doesn't make sense to pay $50 for a steak but I will just assume that those people don't know the meaning of 'fine dining'. A steak can just be a steak if you want it to be. People don't dish out $50 for a steak just because they're hungry. They just want to eat a 'real steak'. Personally I love fine dining because I don't mind spending the money to taste 'real food'.

Last night, we started out with the usual pre-drinking at Vicki's. We were actually also celebrating Peter's birthday as well, so it was a double-birthday. Vicki got a gift card, but not before being tricked into thinking she was getting a vibrator first. The guys put someone's cell phone in there and as she was unwrapping the gift, she felt it vibrate and got pissed because evidently everyone told her she'd be getting a vibrator. Haha.

So we piled into a limo and headed for Muzik Nightclub, which turned out to be more fabulous than I had anticipated. I wasn't looking forward to all the house music, but I was pleasantly surprised with the venue. It was very. very posh. So posh that I was feeling slightly intimidated because everyone there looked so good. I soon figured out why when I discovered the hair and make up lounge in the club, complete with hairstylists, make up artists and free champagne. It was amazing because they gave Vicki the 'big hair' she had wanted (but had since died down from her hair appointment) and I had originally came in with curled hair but I got it 'touched up' professionally. He kinda made my bangs too curly but meh... it was all freeeeeee (but they could easily swing it because the cover charge to the club was $20!).

The rest of the evening was great and I didn't even mind all that house music. Near the end they even played music "that I prefer" so it was alllll good. We got back to Vicki's and I fell asleep as the guys were still hyped up and playing Wii (probably because they were high as kites). Thank goodness it'll probably be awhile until I can party like this again because I'm going to go rub my sore feet and lie down my pounding head.

^ Hmm, a long surprise?
^The Bananas drinking banana liqeur
^Flossy, flossy
^"I want BIG HAIR"
^The girls with our hair did
^Vicki and her cousins

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Westsssssiddddeeee \/\/

P Diddy

Mariah Carey


Swiss Beats

Jennifer Lopez

Suge Knight...

...and, hello, is that Nas?

I wonder why people say 'Hip Hop is Dead'. Is it because two 'rivals' can actually have the nerve to be in the same video and not have their guns pointed at each other?

Long live Tupac and Biggie.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Long days, Dreamful nights

I saw American Gangster on Friday night with the boys, and it was honestly better than I had expected out of a gangster-drug-bang-bang movie. After seeing We Own the Night, I was ready to give up any drug movie altogether. It's all the same shit -- except American Gangster had Common and T.I., so it one-upped all the other gangster-drug-bang-bang movies (because we all know I love me some fine black men). And that's my movie review.

P.S. Not relevant, but after the movie, we played Poker and I took second place for once. Girl Power, fuck the what! :p

Technically, it's 1:15 p.m. right now, but it really should be 2:15 p.m. Is it possible to be utterly thrown off by this Daylight Savings change, because I'm surely feeling it. I feel soooo tired and I was sleeping for nine hours before realizing I just had to get up because half the day was gone.

Lately I've been having some pretty vivid dreams. It might have nothing to do with the time change, it could be the funky Asian food I've been eating, or the the weather change, or my menstrual cycle, or a combination of all. I dunno. Needless to say, it's putting me in some deep sleeps and I wake up so groggy. What have I been dreaming about, you ask? Well that shall be saved for a more X-rated entry.