Saturday, January 21, 2006

I'm a T-R-A-P-S-T-AR

I always see little videos of skateboard bloopers. Alot of them are awful. Guys landing on their asses, on their faces and a couple of 'too-bad-he-wasn't-wearing-a-cup moments'. Of course there's a lot of videos of those kinda things on the internet because it's always fun to see people fail, right?

Well I found one video that was pretty impressive because it's a montage of skateboarders actually making their lands; and the video is made more impressive because they used Young Jeezy's "Trapstar" in the background (yeah, Young Jeezy's music is bad and promotes violence and such but I still like listening to him anyhow). And while we're on the topic of Young Jeezy, I just wanna say that I doubt I'll get sick of this song because the thumping part is just so catchy(even though the video is so typical and ghey).


I mostly hate them when I don't feel I did particularly well in one. They should rename job interviews to "How Well Can You Bullshit?" and resumes to "Bullshit on Paper (and some truths)".

Friday's job interview didn't go as well as I had hoped or fantasized. Has anyone been in an interview where they just ask too many questions? I'm used to the usual "How well do you work with others?" and "What are your weaknesses?" but when you start asking me about stuff that actually has a correct answer where bullshitting is useless, my mind shrivels like manhood in cold water. I was not prepared for questions about "reassurance policies" and "compliancy laws". That morning in the back of my head, I knew I should've done a little more research about insurance law and the like, but dumbass me felt too cocky and lazy to do that.

After the interview I seriously walked aimlessly around the city wondering what the hell I was doing. Is there a reason I perpetually failed that interview? The interviewer actually was asking all the right questions; all the questions that I should know, did know and just couldn't answer. The fact that I didn't do as well as I should've done in this interview makes me doubtful of a successful future for myself because I have no idea what my future is at this point. My brother was right; while I may hate school and yearn to be in the working world now, once I actually start working I will change my mind.

Perhaps I'm being too hard on myself, but it just makes so much sense to me. I'm in my third year of my program and I don't feel as if I'm prepared for anything. I know alot of people say they never even knew what they wanted to do when they got out of school and sometimes still don't, but it's one thing to not know what you want to do than to not know what you're even good at. I think this is the point where some people decide that they will take that year-long break after graduation to contemplate what to do and "find themselves", but I just can't imagine myself sitting around doing nothing and supposedly figure out what I want to do.

ARGH. I'm gonna be another statistic to add to the pile of kids who come out of college with a degree and potential and can't even find work.

No comments: