Friday, February 09, 2007

Be the Lady, not the Tramp

We all know I love brutal honesty. Which is why I'm grateful for the recent advice I have received to "better myself" in my relationships (with men and women). And what is this great advice?

Act like a lady.

Yeah, I know. Sometimes I act like a dick, or like I had one. I'm pretty brash and I can be too sassy. Apparently that needs to stop because it's a.) a turn off to guys, and b.) just plain weird. So I submitted and agreed that I would do a 180 and see if I can truly be polite and be, *gulp*, a little more lady-like for once.

Cuong is my new 'Swear Jar', whereas if I make a certain statement that is... 'not lady-like', I have to give him a quarter. However, I don't think this is gonna be too difficult to maintain. I can be pretty focused and committed if I have to be. Especially when there's money riding on it and my pride is on the line.

A few things that will attribute in my transformation from Tramp to Lady:

  • refrain from treating/objectifying men as sex objects -apparently you can only objectify women.
  • don't check out girls--aloud.
  • less swearing - I can't get rid of it completely, sometimes a 'fuck' is necessary: "FUCK YEAH! Those shoes are hot!" or "Fuck! Fuckin' Wentworth Miller is fucking hot and so fuckin' fuck-worthy, I'd fuck him!".
  • act a little more stupid - no joke, apparently this attracts guys and will soften the edges a little.
  • do the 'tea-and-crumpet' thing more often.
  • don't start off sentences with 'Yo' and 'Dude' or end sentences with 'guy'.
  • laugh at all jokes, especially the non-funny ones (although I personally think this one corresponds to the 'act more stupid' thing).
I can't think of anymore now but I'm sure there are tons more I can do to "enhance my personality". I welcome all suggestions, as usual, because it's the year 2007, baby. Time for a change. Yaaaaarrrgghhh!


kathy said...

I don't see any need for these changes.

(And are you really going to go by what Cuong [who is one person] thinks is 'lady-like'?)

sarah said...

What translates to 'tea and crumpets'?

Donuts and coffee?
Alcohol and hors d'oeuvres?
Sex and drugs?

spinderella said...

Kathy: apparently, the entire thing bothers the guys. And oddly enough, only the GUYS find this a problem. HAHAHA

Sarah: Pick one. I dunno. LOL