Sunday, March 09, 2008

One person's confiscated good, is another's treasure

I recently came across eBay listings from the Toronto Police Auction. I don't know why, but I was semi-hoping to maybe find a once-confiscated Acura RSX (with millions of dollars in cash stowed away in the glove compartment) on there. Instead I came across some interesting items.

When you see the things that are being auctioned off by the police, you can't help but wonder where they have been and how/why/where they were confiscated. Not to mention from whom. They don't put them in the item descriptions but they really should because if I ever bought anything from the police, I will always wonder what stories they hold. I saw things ranging from a bunch of kids' socks (sad) to bikes that were going for 2 bucks!

I think the police would actually get more money if they posted the circumstances in which the items were acquired. Who wouldn't want a former druglord's Persian rug?!

Other items I can't help but wonder where they've been...

Item #1:

Actual eBay Description: "This set of 36 mini nail polish bottles comes in a practical, step down tray for showing off your collection, and hosting a fun, luxurious girls night in. These mini sized bottles are ideal for stowing away in even the smallest night out purse, and make fun, adventurous stocking stuffers too!" (this was probably written buy a guy because we girls don't do 'Girls Nites' with tacky pink nail polish)

What it should probably say: "This set of 36 mini nail polish bottles was part of a raid of a small Asian massage parlour offering massages with 'happy endings' and masquerading as a nail salon in downtown Chinatown."

Item #2

Actual Description: "These funky and fashionable shoes will definitely make you stand out in a crowd! They are black, with about a 4 inch platform heel, and have a running shoe look with laces up the front and shiny stripe accents."

What it should probably say: "These tacky shoes once belonged to a hooker caught in the backseat of a car with Charlie Sheen parked behind the Denny's. Ghonnerhea sold separately."

Item #3 Actual Description: "This classic camera zoom lens appears to be German made. It has a unique look with its aluminum finish."

What it should probably say: "Attention Peeping Toms and Stalkerazzos! Once belonging to former paprazzo-turned Britney's beau, Adnan Ghalib, you too can make great snatches of unsuspecting celeb snatches! This premium German-made lens provides for close-up shots from even the greatest of distances from helicopters and clear moving shots from high-speed moving SUVs on the highways. Creepy mannequin hand sold separately."

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