Time heals all lonely wounds

It is 9: 53 pm and I am BAKING in this heat. Well, actually, there's no sun, so I guess I'm just poaching in this heat. It was yet another scorching, summer, humid day today. Definitely not a day for a walk in the park for seniors and those with lack of good functioning lungs. My boss asked me to run a couple bank errands, which required me to run to the bank across the street. Even though it's only a 3 minute walk, I was panting by the time I got to the bank. I can't believe how hot it is right now. Although I'm probably just saying that because I'm in my computer room and it's a perfect evening for a walk outside. My computer just died because it got overheated. o_o Compaqs suck.

So the other day, I was having a conversation with one of my girl friends. We talked about the usual: what's been going on with our lives, who's doing whom, the parties we've gone to, the trips we've taken, the people we plan to kill. Inevitably she asked me about my love life, as all girls bring this topic up one way or the other with each other...

Her: So are you seeing anyone?

Me: No, not really. Just dating around, nothing serious. Everything's casual.

Her: You need to get a boyfriend.

Me: Why do I 'need' to?

Her: Well, I just want you to be happy.

Whoa. Slap in the face! Well, it's more like a punch to the stomach and a kick to the groin and spit on my neck. I wasn't insulted by her comment, just a little taken back. Does being in a relationship essentially remedy unhappinness?

One of the annoying questions I'm constantly asked is, "Why don't you have a boyfriend?". I wasn't aware that a requisite to being a fabulous and fun, suburban 22 year-old, entailed a boyfriend. How come no one alerted me of this?

It is a popular notion (especially amongst girls, I've found), that to be in a relationship is a life fulfillment, the perfect accessory, and the answer to every "what to do on a Friday night" kinda question (these are the types of people who don't feel "comfortable" not being in a relationship). In these cases, to me, to be in those types of relationships are just a waste of time. Aren't they? I mean, they don't really last, and they end up being a life experience or worst mistake ever.

I once believed that it was OK for me to be perpetually single and just contend to a "hump 'em and dump 'em" lifestyle until I found someone that, a.) didn't piss me off too much and, b.) could put up with my neurosis long enough to maintain a meaningful more-than-friends relationship with me. So now with everyone around me, seemingly, in serious relationships on the brink of marriage and ever after, I'm starting to question whether the 'take it or leave it' chapter of my life is about to expire. It seems like I will soon have to learn to adapt to a certain mechanism of dating, one of which I don't fully understand how/why people behave the way they do (Why do guys go through phases where they're in a Mood? Why is it unacceptable for a man to look at another woman? etc., etc.).

So I guess what I'm trying to do here, is summarize and clarify questions surrounding my personal life and whatnot (because I think I need clarification for myself as well):

1. I am happy. At least I'm feeling content right now. I have great friends to spend my Friday nights with and my shoes are what I use to spoil myself with (because there's noone else to do that!). In essence, yes, I guess you could say I'm 'dating' my shoes. 9 years strong, I think it's getting serious.

2. I put myself out there. I've been typecast as some sort of anti-social, bitter, feminist, I think. It's simply not true. Refusing to see guys shorter than me, does not an anti-socialist make. It's just good sense!

3. I am not only attracted to Black guys. Geez.

4. Sex life. Don't worry about it.

5. I'm still trying to learn how to weed out the "bad" ones and especially the guys who seemingly seem Perfect, but are just as much of assholes as the ones who admit they're assholes.

6. I'm not one of those chicks who only go for guys who treat me like shit (as most girls do). Nice guys finish last in my book. Especially if they let me treat them like shit.

7. I have mostly male friends, not because I'm one of those flirtatious, hard-to-get, toying-with-your-mind kinda chicks. I just happen to not stand most chicks.

8. Yes, I say 'chicks'.

9. No, I'm not gay.

10. Lance Bass is gay, and I honestly didn't see that coming (totally irrelevant, but I figured there should be a #10 listing).

So there you have it, folks. This hopefully clears some questions and general wonderments of what you may have of me.

I suppose I could 'ease' up a bit, and be a bit more forgiving in allowing myself to get to know those obnoxious, stupid or "I'm a Loser" types and have a chuckle with mysef, but it's gonna take a lot of practice for me to get there.

Excuse me, would you happen to have any Grey Poupon?

ETA: More Kincardine pics

Hard to believe, but sometimes I can be a bit of a workaholic and it scares me a little. Yesterday (Saturday), I worked at the office. Voluntarily. I could've refused to, but no, I insisted I finish the paperwork piling on my desk. This is not how I expected things to be. I don't want to end up like those people who have nothing better to do than to come into the office on Saturday (sometimes, even Sunday) to do work. I hope my life would be far more important than frivilous paper work just to meet a deadline (sure, it'll cost some people money because the deadline's been missed but it's just money. Haha).

So after pitter pattering around the office yesterday, I finally pulled myself away from work-ohol at around 3 pm. I really don't admire workaholics because I realized I missed a good chunk of my weekend.

So last night, I indulged in a little 'culture' and a little 'fancy'. I went out with my siblings for dinner at a fancy schmancy placed called Via Allegro. I was forewarned that there was a 'dress code' (when I hear 'dress code', I think the dress codes that are required at clubs: no hats/runners, dressy jeans allowed. How sad is that?) and that it would be a different experience than going to some other restaurant like Milestones or Moxie's.

So when I got there, sat down and opened the menu, I realized that the only 'dress code' that you need to acquire to is a big, fat wallet. Let's just say a martini was $15 and I would have to work at least four hours to pay off an appetizer. Yeah. Talk about a whole new experience (Although I would have to say Ruth's Chris is the most expensive restaurant I've been to, but wasn't as variated, menu-wise, as Via Allegro).

I never realized my brother has such pompous and an elaborated taste for food, and I was so psyched to try the ever elusvie foie gras (pronounced fwa graa, not foyee grass). Lemme tell you a little thing about this 'foie gras'. First of all, it's a fancy (and French) way of saying 'duck liver'. I'm not a big fan of liver in general (my parents have to bribe me to even eat one piece) but I was determined to give it a try as it is a big, big thing in food culture nowadays as I've read so much about it from fancy people (it's even banned in Boston or Chicago! How dangerous of me). Second of all, they come in teeny tiny portions but costs about an arm and half a leg. It makes a bowl of Pho seem like the best deal in the world, even if it's only broth, noodles and some Grade B beef.

So how was foie gras? Well, I had it in two variations: pate and 'stock'-form (the way it originally comes in. I'm using car lingo to describe food!). It was alright. It's not something I would indulge in very often and it probably wouldn't be the first thing I ordered if I ever came back to this place or something similar. Texture wasn't the same as cow liver (maybe a bit smoother) and the pate form was especially very smooth.

The other food was really good, though. I had what I would call 'surf n turf': sea bass, calamari and tiger shrimp with wild rice. Mmm. I admit expensive food tastes alot different than 'regular' food (Pho, stuff you find at Moxie's) but I wouldn't say it's better. Just different. And as small as the portions were, I was amazingly pretty full by the end of the evening (yeah, I eat like a bird).

All in all, it was a great evening. It was a good experience and I hope it's not the last time I ever go to a place like that, now that I've had a taste of the 'good life'. However, it isn't so bad coming down to 'my life', where I can wear whatever the hell I want and eat my $1 Vietnamese sandwiches and Caesar salads.

More pics from Kincardine:^Ow, OW, OW!: Me and Ale trying to walk on rocks

^Get your mind out of the gutter! That's a rock wedged in between a crack in the rock bed.

^Alex, Kathy and me: not sure whether to jump in

^Come on in, the water's fine. Right, Iljya? ^So NOT jacuzzi-like ^Rock beach < Sandy beach

^Fuck the gym, this is real bench-pressing ^Go boy! Catch the frisbee!

In a dream, my love, you will find my heart...

What an exhausting fucking week. I've been working overtime everyday, like 10-hour work days. This week has been exceptionally long because I had about 7 closings this week, five of which were on the same day. For those who don't really speak real estate: it's like having five assignements due on one day, each with an exceptional amount of paper work in which you have to rely on other people to provide to you. Yeah, it just sucks. However, I'm learning lots, so that would probably make it a successful feat.

The pics from last weekend at Kincardine and Lake Simcoe.

^Kickin' it

^Maybe it's just Alex and Iljya, but I don't get the Russian fascination with axing... ^What was left of the bottle after mine and Alex's night of binge drinking ^Alex hangin' out ^All I have to say is: Alex is 21 12 ^This pic is kinda weird because me and Kathy are just hanging out on a ladder, but it's a nice picture for some reason ^Kathy and I More found at www.iljya.com, hopefully. ^Me (not pictured), the boys, the platoon and the water

Hella tired now. More updates later.

A Shoutout to my Fellow Canucks

I really don't pay much attention to Canadian guys. I mean, I'm not purposely not attracted to Canadian guys. I just happen to be attracted to 'ethnic' guys. I guess the nice guys don't really do it for me.

However, I'm going to have to re-evaluate that. I used to watch the show Animorphs and, well, I don't know if it was Shawn Ashmore or his twin brother (I've given up trying to distinguish between those two) who was in it, but I always thought he was decent looking. But look at him now!

And how bout that Kevin Zegers? Never watched any of those Air Bud movies, but I always thought he was kinda cute too. He's now grown into his looks and somewhat resembles Taylor Hanson, which makes me giddy with pre-pubescent glee.

These guys could easily pass as some hot euro non-gay fashion models. It doesn't hurt that they're dapperly dressed (at Milan Fashion Week). *swoon.

Speaking of Canadian actors, Elisha Cuthbert is reportedly in tentative talks to star in the American version of My Sassy Girl as the Sassy Girl. I don't really know what to think, as I'm still opposed to this movie becoming Americanized (ditto for Battle Royale). Although I do think Sarah Michelle Gellar would play her better (maybe she costs too much?).

We're running wild as we're restless, and we jump till we're breathless

I hope everyone had a good weekend. A decent one, at least. The summer weeks are tick tocking by! School is coming up (well, it just feels like it, because I'm starting to buy my text books already) and pretty soon everyone will be too busy to do anything.

My weekend was of the awesome, yet again. Gotta love those road trips to the country. A summer home in the country is definitely something I will invest in when I have the time/money. I should round up a group of friends and we can split it and timeshare it. Woot.

This weekend ended up being a couple of seperate plans that Alex and I managed to roll into one. Team 'Win'!!

Man, we are such troopers, I must say. Our choices for the weekend were to either go to Kincardine, near Lake Huron or to Lake Simcoe for a fishing trip on a platoon (I dunno why I like saying that word. Platoon. Platoooooooon.). It was really hard to decide so we did BOTH despite these locations being on either sides of the provinces, almost. I think. I'm not totally sure. I actually didn't even look at a map at all this weekend. Totally relied on driving directions from the internet, which was not entirely the best idea.

We decided that we'd spend two nights in Kincardine and drive Sunday morning to meet the boys for fishing at Lake Simcoe. Do-able? There were doubts, but I was determined to make it work...

So Alex and I left the Sauga on Friday night, after I had dinner with the girls at Moxie's ($30 meal!! Oh well, it was a mini celebration of my new found employment to myself) and a 'quick' pick up from the LCBO. We left alot later than I had hoped, but Alex contended that since that is what usually happens with us and plans---we were doing well. Haha. And we actually did make the normally 3-hour trip to Kincardine in record time by flying down deserted country roads at night in his teeny tiny Civic.

Iljya's mother's new house is fantastic. It was custom made and stuff and I was pretty impressed that my room was hexagonal-shaped. The first night I didn't end up in the room as me and Alex promptly got drunk and downed a good chunk of liquor!

Keep in mind, that bottle was new, and we had about 2/3 of a huge bottle of liqeuer! We passed out on the floor at about 5 am. I didn't even have a hangover the next morning, which was impressive. The next morning we went to the beach that is just steps from the house. What a freezing swim that was, but it definitely woke me up. Me and Alex even adopted a baby snail, and I brought it home to 'raise'. "Snaily" needs to be christened with a new name, though.

Me and Kathy went downtown to 'sightsee'. There isn't really much sight to be seen in Kincardine that you don't see in other small, small towns, especially since we were there just a year ago and not much has happened (although the Asian market has extended their merchandise to a few garments and yarn).

I could've checked out the Tim Horton's that Marc Jacobs' muse, Jessica Stam, was discovered (yes, she was discovered in a Timmy's in Kincardine!). How could a chick from a small, desolate area like Kincardine inspire this, the Stam bag?

Kincardine should really use Jessica Stam to promote tourism and it'll attract some fashoinable tourists! Although there weren't a lot of fashionable types there to begin with, mostly punk rock skater types.

Kathy and I did the usual consignment window-shopping and used book store-browsing. We BBQ'd and later that night we watched the "Best Sunset in the World" off Lake Huron, and then... we skinny-dipped. I can finally check that off my list of 'Things that Need to be Done before The Inevitable". However, it was unfortunate that I lost my virginity to skinny-dipping to a freezing, rocky lake beach. I would have to describe that first experience like the first time two teenagers lose their virginities to each other: rocky, painful and a dark blur.

I wouldn't say that the skinny-dipping was the most exiciting thing I did in Kincardine. The most exciting thing would have to be the walk back to the house. You see, to get to the beach from the house, you have to take this long path through the forest and there are no real big clear paths, just a little troddened one. For some reason that night, noone thought to bring a flashlight and we were left stumbling around in the forest, whilst shivering cold and barely dressed for hiking in pitch darkness trying to find the path to lead us home! Woo, boy. Let's just say, that was a worst fear realized: total darkness, alone and cold.

Eventually we found our way home by looking up and following where the trees made a clearing to the sky. We really need to hone our nature survival skills. It was still fun though. Not at the time, but it was fun that we had that thrill. "Oooooh, Blair Witch, guys!"

So, by the time we got to bed, it was midnight. I knew sure as hell Alex wouldn't get up so I knew I'd have to be the one to get us up and going. I had an alarm clock and Iljya's stepdad's old cell phone to wake me. The aim was to wake up at 4am...we woke up at 5am. Why? Let's just say, the alarm clock didn't wake me, the cell phone did. And although the cellphone was set to 4:00 am the cell phone was old...and set to a different time because of daylight savings...once upon a time.

At 5 am:

I bolted out of bed, shook the shit out of Alex, packed up his shit, let the cat in the house, fed the cat, put on makeup, packed the car and made the effort to write a thank-you note for Iljya's parents.

Alex...slept.

We finally set off at about 5:30 am, one friggin' hour behind schedule!!! But we did make it to the Lake Simcoe Marina, safe and sound. I was amazed that I was still up for fishing after just under 5 hours of sleep. I even caught three fish, I was so proud. They may not have been whale-sized, but I was still very pleased. The boys, however, were not. Out of 7 of them, one fish was brought back. Put that, together with less than substantial amount of sleep and you get 7 fatigued and disappointed guys. Not exactly the partying type, but I still had a great time.

After fishing, Alex and I satisfied his craving for french toast (yeah, odd craving) and ended up at the Golden Griddle. It wasn't the Waffle House, but it sufficed well. I came home with a new pet, dirty laundry, three fish and tons of memories and pictures. Weekend was a success.

Shoutouts: Alex, thanks for putting up with my singing and not leaving me on the side of the road. Thanks to Dev, for organizing the fishing trip at Lake Simcoe. Kathy and Iljya, the skinny-dipping was a one-time thing, right?

Pictures of the trip shall follow, hopefully soon. My camera's currently MIA and I know it'll take Kathy a good 6 months to send me Iljya's pics. Speaking of which, thanks for the fire pics, Kathy. FINALLY.