Play Nice

I found this hilarious article about Booty Call Etiquette. It's hilarious because it's so true. Trust. ;)

To summarize, the 8 Commandments of Calls for the Booty:

1. Thou shalt not wine and dine the Booty Call. I hate that awkwardness of 'who pays' afterwards. It should be the person who called for Booty first.
2. Thou shalt not Booty Call as per schedule. It's a Booty Call, not a class.
3. Thou shalt not date Booty Call. Remember when Carrie did that on SATC? There's a reason why they're good in bed: too dumb to function anywhere else but the bedroom.
4. Thou shalt look good. Otherwise, you might as well be married. Oh DISS to the married people!
5. Thou shalt keep Booty Call at arms-length and expect nothing. If you're sensitive and shit, Booty Calls aren't for you.
6. Thou shalt keep it real. Booty Calls are like the best of both worlds: best friend-like conversations and all the sex.
7. Thou shalt use a condom. Duh.
8. Thou shalt be like Batman. Expect the Call anytime, anywhere like the Bat Signal.

Bitch, I'm the bomb, like tick...tick

The weather lately has sucked. Only a couple of weekends left of summer, and if I have to endure more wet weekends, I'll officially claim August (the best month of summer, I think) a dud. Essentially, we couldn't go up to the caves up north or the beach, so this weekend is a dud.

I'm also freezing, yes freezing, because all the windows and doors in my house are opened because the walls are being painted. And I can't stop yawning. Last night I was at Circa and woke up this morning to go out for breakfast and came home to take a nap but that's not enough. I don't want to go back to sleep because I don't really want to waste this day (yet here I am, typing away on my computer).

Yesterday was almost a bust, as well. I was gonna go to the Taste of Danforth but it down-poured. Everyone else went anyway, but instead I decided to catch up with an old friend I haven't spoken to in about a year. I'm not going to lie, we met on the internet years ago. Let's call him 'C'. This was back when I actually met people on the internet. These days, I'm just fending off the incessant calls from guys I foolishly give my number away to in clubs. You could say I struck lucky with C because he's non-crazy and he's pretty cool. He's also good-looking and funny, but that's another story. I will just say that he's just a really good friend and that's all. In any case, we've kept in touch for a couple of years and stuff.

I went grocery shopping with him and then we had dinner. After dinner I had to go home to get ready to go out. We hugged and although I was happy we had met up again, I was left with a 'bad taste in my mouth'.

He had given me some interesting advice and a prediction of my future that for some reason scares the crap out of me. I don't usually like to hear other perceptions of me, especially when I've already dictated to myself how I am. However, in this case, I just took his opinions like a beating. He basically said that I am holding a lot of unheard questions and feelings inside (unheard to those who deserve to hear it) and that as time progresses, one of these days I will SNAP. It didn't matter how many times I spent money to fly away from my problems, the pressure will keep building and I will go ape-shit one of these days. Needless to say, he said he didn't want to be there when that happened because he contends he knows me more than I think he knows me. I can't help but think that he does, this stranger from the internet. And now I'm scared because maybe I believe him.

Why? Because I don't want to go ape-shit. I feel as though my problems are my own and no one else should be affected or be the ape-shitee (even if they're involved or the cause). What can I say? I'm an introvert. I'm content with believing that my problems are the fault of my own actions. And I'm also afraid of what other irrational act I will do when that time comes (cliff-jumping in Bora-Bora??).

'So what do I do?' I asked him. He said there was only two ways to go: either blow up now and get answers to the questions I can't get out of my head to quell my thoughts (and face the repercussions, as awkward as they will be) or get away from my problems...permanently. I don't see either of them as being an option right now, but the clock is ticking, isn't it?

If You Didn't Notice, You Mean Everything

I realized the other day that the summer is already ending. One more month and then it will be Fall. The leaves will die and fall, the cold weather will come in, and the year will end.

Am I bumming you out? Sorry.

I really don't know why I am thinking of bad things now. Summer usually brings the optimism out of me. This year, not so much. I don't think 2008 has been the greatest, not just for me but for others around me.

*Gasp!* Could it be that being associated with me is bad karma? Without going into too many details, I find myself trying to hold everyone up while trying to keep my head above water myself. And it's not that I mind being the support beam (because I really, really don't mind), but I feel so useless because I don't have all the answers. I really, really wish I did.

If I was a more spiritual person, I'd say to leave it up to the gods, but I'm not. So I've run out of encouraging things to say.

I find myself at a lost for words when trying to console someone and I blame that on me having such a 'spoiled' life in that I haven't experienced real problems (knock on wood!!!). It's so hard to try and say something hopeful when I haven't experienced a nasty divorce, a mother in the hospital, a dislocated foot or a messy break up of a relationship. How can I be hopeful when I really don't know if everything will be all right?

I find myself giving the same advice to everyone who asks me when the hurt will go away and that is the only thing I believe that truly works, the closest thing I can think of that gives some hope: Time. It's a not a quick fix-it but it is the closest thing to a cure.

Secretly, I feel like such a hypocrite, though. How can I say such a thing when I have the ability to hurt and not know how things will be over time? For now, it all seems so hopeless because it still feels fresh. I just want to think that time will cure everything (and for others to think this as well). I'm such a fucking liar and I hate that.

I guess at this point all I can do is try to believe in my own words and wait for the days to go by.

Oh, magical Time. Why can't you be more like Tylenol: quick-acting and long-lasting? I just need that Extra Strength.